|  |  |  | | | | | Wedding Blogs | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | 
We’re big on DIY weddings here at IW, so when we discovered the stylin’ personalized labels from Bottle Your Brand, we couldn’t wait to let our readers know about them. At Bottle Your Brand, you can easily give your DIY wedding projects that professional look with completely customized, high quality labels. Whether they are labels to go on your homemade jam: 
Monogrammed labels for your favor boxes filled with homemade caramels or other goodies: 
Personalized labels for water bottles (a nice way to keep your guests cool at an outdoor, summer wedding): 
Customized wine labels for your wedding wine: 
Or stylin’ labels for your treat-filled DIY favor bags:   
Bottle Your Brand has your DIY projects covered! For more custom label designs go to Bottle Your Brand.  | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Eco tends to be a bit of a fleeting buzzword in the wedding world and although people often give ‘locally sourced’ and ‘british grown’ a nod in their planning this couple made planning an ethical and earth friendly day their main priority. That and the abundance of love on display make it a joy to share with you all. Huge thanks go to Mister Phill, their Photographer (who we have long been not-so-secret fans of!) for sending it in to us. 
Sarah and Tim held their wedding service at The Immaculate Conception, Liphook (our church) with wedding celebrations in their garden, on September 11 2010. Organic and Handmade Local dressmaker Danielle Taylor designed and made my dress using organic silk that she sourced especially for my dress, and loved so much that she will use for all dresses going forwards. She was delighted to discover no price difference between organic and non-organic material. The dress was designed to be fun to wear, simple and practical for garden use. Danielle was the most enthusiastic person you could imagine. I loved having my dress made by her, it was a very personal and enjoyable experience. 
I wore a blue garter which my Mom made from one of my Dad's shirts. He is no longer with us, so it was another way to keep him close. I also carried my (also deceased) Gran's lace hanky. Not a heels sort of a girl, I didn't want to feel like a different person on my wedding day, so I just went for a simple pair of beach sandals. Flower Child I wanted to keep my look natural/earthy and simple, so I just had flowers in my hair. On my wrist I had a snake pearl bangle that my sister made for me recycling some family pearls. 
Wedding rings – Tim's ring was made from re-cycled gold by talented local jeweller Duncan Eves (Petersfield Folly Market). Mine belonged to my Gran and is platinum. They were married during the war when my jewellery making Grandfather and his colleagues in the Birmingham Jewellery quarter had been re-deployed to war work. He made the ring for her calling in various favours to get the materials. It is with that 'to the ends of the earth' type love that they lived their married lives, and that is what I hope it will bring into my marriage. Duncan sparkled it up for us. The Old Fashioned Way… I had my hair curled the old fashioned way using rollers, to add some body, then simply secured in a half up/half down style with flowers to decorate. 
My make up was again very simple and natural with a earth friendly mineral makeup range. Both hair and makeup were done locally at Liphook's Escarda salon. Go for Green
 Tim and his boys hired their suits from Moss Bros. Many of Tim's friends go back to his school days, so I collected old 'prefect' badges for them to wear, with 'head boy' for Tim and 'vice head boy' for the best man. Tim had a favourite green tie which was actually the item that dictated the colour scheme rather than the other way around! The green was matched in the jewellery and pashminas of the bridesmaids. 
The bridesmaids wore simple white dresses, which is actually the traditional colour for bridesmaids, who are supposed to confuse any evil forces away from the bride! I wanted them to have something that they would wear again and feel themselves in. They chose their own dresses and elected to wear the same. 
Because it was an outdoor wedding in September I was concerned that we might be cold, so when I saw green pashminas on the online ethical shopping store http://www.thenaturalstore.co.uk/ I thought we had the solution – they were ethically sourced cashmere and silk fabric hand printed with eco-friendly inks. However, when I came to order, they had finished the line. A bit disappointed, I got in touch with the designer http://www.candicewren.co.uk/ to see if she had more, and she was lovely. She ended up designing a sunflower print just for us, and for the same price too! 
Tim looked very handsome and traditional in his hired morning suit and favourite tie. But, as corney as the truth sounds, the thing that made me swoon was the love that he wore in his heart. He had worked so hard in the run up to the wedding – in such a labour of love – that I couldn't have felt more loved and supported. And as I made my way up the aisle, the words of the song that I had chosen to enter to couldn't have been more heartfelt…. Annie's Song.
You fill up me senses like a night in a forest
Like the mountains in springtime, like a walk in the rain
Like a storm in the desert, like a sleepy blue ocean
You fill up my senses come fill me again. Come let me love you, let me give my life to you
Let me drown in your laughter, let me die in your arms
Let me lay down beside you, let me always be with you
Come let me love you, come love me again. A Sunny Disposition… I love sunflowers – their bright, cheerful colour, their sunny disposition and the fact that they will always seek out the light (great role models!), so it was always going to be sunflowers! Plus, they are in season for September and easy to grow.
Tim and I grew them together, along side our veg patch. They didn't all bloom in time, so our florist supplemented them with stems from her supplier. Our fabulous florist Findlays was chosen because she is local and because she was 100% supportive of us growing our own flowers. She totally got our earthy theme and created the most perfect arrangements. In the church we had arrangements on the altar, and stems on each pew. At home we had arrangements around the garden in milk churns and other old rustic vessels that we begged and borrowed, smaller arrangements on the tables and a flower on each plate. 
A quick mention about confetti….I love confetti – it is a fun tradition that gives guests something physical to do to express their joy immediately after the ceremony. People get a bit conscious about approaching the bride and groom out of order and there is often a bit of a stand off as the right order is worked out. Confetti takes all of that away – an ice-breaker if you will. But we also wanted to respect the environment. Out walking the dog one afternoon, I stuck upon the answer. We live surrounded my heather, which separates into pretty buds and dries very easily. So we collected a big bag, and divided it into cones made from recycled brown paper, which our flower girl handed out on the day. Sun on a Cake My best friend Sara made our cakes for us. I was playing with some ideas about home made cakes one weekend when she was visiting. Armed with a photo of an outrageously expensive cake with stylised sunflowers on it, I was pondering the question of 'how can we do that ourselves?'. It was a pretty arrogant question, as I quickly proved to be hopeless at moulding icing. Sara was another matter however. Although she too had never made a decorated cake, she is an arty lass experienced in working clay. She was just doodling really, but when she made a lifelike replica of a daffodil growing outside and loved doing it, the answer was staring us in the face. Sara was going to be cake maker.  She did an extraordinary job. We had one small cake to cut and 100 cupcakes. They were all homemade organic carrot cakes or chocolate beetroot cakes all with buttercream icing. Each cupcake had a handmade sunflower on top, and the big cake had a lifelike sunflower bloom. We cut the cake using the cake knife that my Mom and Dad used at their wedding. Nobody could believe it! We all really hope that she goes into business with it. She took several commissions the night of the wedding. (contact can be made through me) You just can’t beat a sunflower for bringing a bit of sunshine your way can you? And can you believe they grew them all themselves? Just wait until you see the explosion of colour that is the reception… Yours Truly, Rebecca
xoxo | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Here's one for the diaries for all you lovely Brides, and of course Grooms to be, who are planning a vintage style wedding. A brand new bridal show, celebrating the top notch designers and suppliers of all things vintage, is making its debut in Birmingham next year. With vintage influences making themselves very much at home in the fashion world, the Designer Vintage Bridal Show, organised by bridal shoe designer Rachel Simpson and Clare Guest, co-owner of The Wedding Club, a designer and vintage bridal boutique, will showcase exceptional talent within the bridal industry. From designer gowns to boudoir style underwear, from head to toe, from brand new to vintage originals, from fashion shows to afternoon tea and all nicely wrapped up with entertainment and a chance to meet and talk to the experts - and one or two Wedding Bloggers may be around to chat with too!
Rachel Simpson says "Vintage fashion keeps on making a comeback and never more so than in the bridal market. With so much creative talent coming from the heart of the country, it made perfect sense to pull them all together under one roof, to create the Midlands' first designer vintage bridal show..." 
Clare Guest reports that "More and more frequently we are asked by brides, where they can find ideas for a truly vintage styled wedding..." That's a pretty fabulous line up, above right there hey?! Highbury Hall, an impressive Victorian house, plays host to the two-day event, where guests can wander through an explosion of eras, each area dedicated to a decade of style, oozing with treasures and must-haves for the vintage loving bride-to-be. 
How beautiful! And incase you didn't notice the detail in the post above just now, let me blow-it up a little larger for you... 
Yes, I'll be there, along with Kat Williams, the infamous Rock n Roll Bride - to meet and chat along with Brides to be planning their wedding and have a good old chin wag with industry contacts. I can't wait! :) Click here to register your attendance at the Designer Vintage Bridal exhibition and you will be contacted as soon as further details become available. You can also email the event organisers for further information on info@designervintagebridal.co.uk. I'd so love to see you there - do leave a comment below if you can make it or hope to make it :) Much love :) Annabel xXx ♥ | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Our latest featured wedding from Chicago’s Kehoe Design is a lovely shade of pink and red with a bit of whimsy as well. Worth a peek! | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Pale | | | November 29, 2010 at 8:40 AM | | | | 
My first trip to the tanning bed was at age 14. I quit three years ago because I was already noticing damage—at age 21. I've had to face the truth: it is NOT in my skin's nature to be tan. My dad is from England, which is why I am very pale and also freckled. J comes from pale stock as well, and he literally works in the basement of a hospital. Together we are all but fluorescent. Some girls' skin does fine with tanning. Mine does not, and that's okay. Now it's all SPF, all the time…and sometimes even hats. Except….okay.
I've had a few relapses. A few trips to the beach wherein I felt I should be awesomely tanned. It's like any other tendency that you try to quit…it sounds great at the time, and I feel guilty afterward. When I have moments of doubt, I remind myself that some of my favorite celebrities are also the palest: 
See? Gorgeous! And yet. I will admit that Mr. PD and I both have concerns about being chalky, ghostly, and even reflective at our wedding. We don't want to look sickly in our pictures. I am telling you this because you MUST NOT LET ME CAVE. I can overuse bronzer, I can use spray tan, but hold me accountable! I want my skin to be soft and healthy into old age, and I don't want to get back on the tan track. Does anyone else fight the tanning temptation?  | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Today’s tip of the week is all about wedding accessories…enjoy my friends! | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | 
Shoe love is true love, Right? Well I'm seriously in love with these patent heart platform heels, which would look amazing if worn by a bride or her bridesmaids. They come in an array of different colours and at the super cheap price of $47 USD a pair…my head and heart are spinning! {shoes}
| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | I chose this post because it reminded me when I was knee-deep in wedding details that (as I wrote in another post) a wedding is not a single “perfect day.” Instead, it's a long process that begins with the moment you declare your commitment to marry, encompasses actions and decisions both significant and banal, and involves discussion, compromise, and community. It's about the joining of two families, two cultures, two worldviews, not just about the joining of two people or the throwing of one awesome party. As I reread it now, this post still evokes the sense of adventure, love, commitment, and trepidation I felt—and still feel—about becoming a Chewish wife. ~~~ I've mentioned before that I'm in the process of converting to Judaism, and I've promised to write a longer post about my decision to convert and what the conversion process entails. So here goes a loooong two-part post… The popular assumption is that anyone who converts to Judaism for marriage does so only after being pressured into it (usually by a naggy future mother-in-law, whom I'll call "Estelle," after George Costanza's mother). "My darling baby boy. You can't marry a shiksa!" kvetches Estelle. "Did you eat? Are you eating? Vy are you so thin? Is that shiksa not feeding you?" But Mr. HC's family has never expressed any concern about his marrying "outside of the tribe" or put any pressure on me to go Jew. To the contrary, they're to this day incredulous that I'd want to do such a thing! What led me to convert was this:
Judaism has played a very important role in Mr. HC's life. His closest friends are those he made in Hebrew school, who bunked with him in the "dork tent" in Jewish summer camp, and who traveled with him to Israel. He wanted our future children to have these experiences as much as I wanted our children to celebrate their Chinese heritage. He hopes that our children will feel "at home" in both cultures. I, on the other hand, hope that our children will inhabit a corporate identity, such that they are not sometimes Jewish and sometimes Chinese, but rather always a union of both. But however our children choose to deal with the identity question, we know that we want them to be truly bicultural, to be Chinese and Jewish. The Chinese part is easy: I'm as chinky as they come. FOP, yo (that's "fresh off the plane" for those of you not hip to the immigrant child lingo). The Jewish part, however, is harder. Since Judaism is matrilineal, in order for our children to be Jewish, I'd have to be Jewish. While that is my primary impetus for converting, I've always been drawn to Judaism. I grew up in a part of L.A. that had a sizeable Jewish population. I have probably sipped more Shirley Temples at bar and bat mitzvahs than many Jews-by-birth. In fact, here's a picture of me leaving for my first bar mitzvah. No, young un's, that is not a lamp shade around my ass; that was actually a trendy dress style back in the day. Also check out my sad attempt at teased bangs. And my super long faux pearl earrings from Claires. Clearly, I thought I was awesome. 
[Hot Cocoa, circa 1990, all ready to slow dance to Belinda Carlisle.] Anyway, this is all to say that Judaism has never really felt foreign to me. Since Mr. HC and I started dating when I was sixteen (and I dated two Jewish boys before him!), I was always surrounded by Jewish culture, and have been struck by how the values of Judaism—the respect for one's ancestors, the love of family, the focus on education—were so similar to those of my Chinese family. Then in college I took a class on the Parable in the Western Tradition, which looked at influence of Jewish writings on modern literature. And I figured out that the approach of Judaism toward texts—the whole culture is focused around interpretation and debate of texts—was completely suited to my worldview. I'm a lawyer and a literature scholar— could there be any religion more appropriate?! 
[Image source.] To say that I felt an affinity with Judaism, though, is not to say that I didn't have some doubts. Quite often, the thing that is difficult for those who convert is the taking on of a minority consciousness and identity. Objectively speaking, it's pretty weird to want to become a part of a group that has been marginalized, shunned, and persecuted since time immemorial. That aspect of it was not so hard for me. As a Chinese-American and an immigrant, I have always had a minority, diasporic consciousness and identity. This is not to say that being Jewish is like being any other minority. Indeed, one of the tough questions I've been working out is what it means to be both Jewish and Chinese and American—how these identities interact, complicate, challenge, and enrich one another. But it is to say that I don't expect to wake up the day after my conversion and be inhabiting a marginalized status that I never understood before. What was— is—difficult for me, though, is the God thing. While my family is Buddhist, I've always been agnostic—not bold enough to be atheist, but too humble to insist that no higher entity exists. Mr. HC is agnostic, as are most of our Jewish friends and family. But it's one thing to be agnostic when one is born into a religion, and quite another to embrace a monotheistic religion while struggling with the concept of one God. I'm still struggling. Mightily. But here's what makes me think Judaism is a right fit for me: the rabbis with whom I'm studying are not only okay with my struggling, they welcome it—encourage it. My sponsoring rabbi (*more about this tomorrow, when I write about the conversion process) encourages me to be open to the concept of holiness, is careful not to characterize God as "He" or to anthropomorphize God, and allows me to ask the big, difficult, head-hurting questions. I don't think I would be converting if Judaism were a religion that insists on blind faith. It just wouldn't make sense to me if a group of people who have suffered a Holocaust can have an unvexed relationship with God. Do you and your fiance/e come from different religious or cultural backgrounds? Are you considering converting? How are you melding your respective religions or cultures into a family identity?  | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Here's a little something I learned yesterday. Magical Alie… 
Plus Angela Jiles from Blue Note Bakery… Equals…
A Wafflette in a sugar coma. We went cake tasting recently at Blue Note Bakery with my sassy friend/planner Alie Twigger (aka Magical Alie) of Sweet Events. Angie Jiles, baker extraordinaire brought an enormous plate of pastries to the tasting table for our pleasure. Our plan is to have a small 6″ cutting cake (to appease Mama Waffle who wants us to have something to cut) and a plethora of bite-sized pastries. Lucky for us Waffles, small bites are one of Angie's specialties! We gorged ourselves on tarts, bourbon bites, s'mores, gluten free cake, blobs of custard, buttercreams, Mexican wedding cookies and slices of cake bars. What are cake bars? They are an ingenious way to have cake and not have to eat a ginormous slice. Here's a pic of one our favorites from Blue Note's website. It's pistachio cake with an espresso cream filling! Yummmmm! The fondant is good too and I am not usually a fondant fan.  Mmmm…Cake Bars! It was all sooooo fantastic, but towards the end I was starting to feel a bit sick. Honestly, too much sugar makes Miss Waffle go a little woozy and nauseous. I think we came away with a good idea of what we want, though. Here are the front-runners for our dessert table so far… - 6″ Toasted Almond cutting cake with Swiss Buttercream
- Cake Bars: Pistachio Cake w/ Espresso Cream, Carrot Cake with Cream Cheese, and gluten free Chocolate Hazelnut Cake with Guinness Buttercream (yes, I said GUINNESS Buttercream and yes, it's ingenious)
- Pecan Pie Tarts
- Vanilla Custard Tarts
- Key Lime Blackberry Bars
- S'mores
- Mini Eclairs
Uh-oh, I think I'm going into sugar coma mode just writing about it. So worth it, though! Are you opting out of the traditional large cake? What kind of desserts will you serve at your wedding instead?  | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Hey, remember this post? All about how terribly I sleep the night before a big event and how much I was hoping to avoid that the night before our wedding? Uh, yeah. Old habits die hard, I guess. I fell asleep pretty easily around 12:30 AM, but I burst wide awake at 4:30 AM. I knew as soon as I woke up that I was awake for the day—my mind was racing with excitement and nerves, and although I lay in the bed and tried to rest and relax enough to fall back asleep, I knew it wasn't really gonna happen. Around 6:30 or 7:00 I did manage to calm down enough to sleep for another thirty minutes or so, but that was it. When I decided to get up for the morning, around 8:00 AM, I got my first happy thrill of the day. Pittsburgh is absolutely notorious for its unpredictable weather, which is very often gray, gloomy, windy, and rainy. I hadn't even let myself think about what our wedding-day weather might be like (and in the planning stages, never once considered the possibility of an outdoor ceremony or reception!) because I knew the chances of a truly gorgeous day in Pittsburgh were not that high. So when I got up that morning and tentatively drew back the blinds in my room, I actually gasped out loud. Even as early as 8:00 AM, it was obvious that we were going to have absolutely perfect weather. The skies were bright blue and cloudless, with lots of gorgeous, crisp sunshine. I was so excited about the fact that, if nothing else, we would have no weather-related stresses or headaches!
I emerged from my bedroom into the living room of our suite, where Bridesmaids Katie, Leigha, and Lauren were also getting up and around. We all marveled at the beautiful day a little more, and soon, Bridesmaids Erica, Clara, and Hannah arrived at our suite, too. We sat down and enjoyed a breakfast of bagels, fruit, coffee, mimosas, and episodes of Teen Mom. A little while later, our hairstylist Brooke and makeup artist Julie arrived, and it was time to get down to business. We set up a bridal-party assembly line, with the girls taking turns in the hair and makeup chairs.
Bridesmaid Clara is probably wondering, “HAS AMBER NO SHAME?!”
Look at that pretty MOH!
HOW CUTE is Bridesmaid Erica's makeup? Julie looked at Erica's brown hair and eyes and declared that she had to give her “the full Snow White.” Something that surprised me was how nervous I felt all morning. I am not normally afraid to be the center of attention (cue my sister cackling away from wherever she's reading this and calling it the understatement of the century), but the anticipation of what was to come gave me low-grade butterflies from 8:00 AM onward. The mimosas Bridesmaid Leigha diligently kept in my hand all morning helped keep them at bay, and so did all the excited chatting with my bridesmaids, but the jittery, keyed-up feeling never fully went away.
Nervous and excited all at once. Also, check out that killer bruise on my leg! I am such a klutz that I walked straight into the coffee table in the middle of the room a few days earlier.
Grandma Octopus stopped by to check in on the proceedings, but mostly to help herself to our mimosa stash. One by one, the girls (and an errant Groomsman/Brother Adam, who was found wandering the halls with a head full of cowlicks and was promptly dragged into the suite for a mimosa and a hairstyle intervention) finished up their primping routines, until there was only one girl left: moi.
I think out of all the vendors we used for our entire wedding day, Julie (the makeup artist) may have been my absolute favorite. I gave her free reign to do whatever she thought would look best with each maid's hair color and complexion, and she killed it. And when she was all done with MY makeup? Not gonna lie: I felt absolutely gorgeous. Julie is great at not overloading your face with makeup, and when I headed off to the bathroom to check out the final results, I actually chuckled and thought to myself, “Wow, I look awesome.”
So we were all made up and styled, and the girls were putting their dresses and accessories on as well. Julie and Brooke packed up, wished us luck, and took off, and our photographer Corey was scheduled to arrive shortly afterward. The plan was for her to photograph me getting dressed in my wedding gown, and then to head out for some all-girls pre-ceremony portraits. But, bad luck: Corey called and let us know that, due to traffic from road construction, her arrival to the hotel was going to be delayed. It wasn't a big deal because we had plenty of time before we actually needed to leave for the ceremony, and I wanted the “bride getting dressed” shots more than a few extra rounds of portraits with the bridesmaids. So, there was nothing to do but wait. This was when my nerves kicked into high gear. I hadn't left the hotel suite at all that day, and my six bridesmaids, my mom, my grandma, my aunt, the hairstylist and makeup artist, and my brother had all been filtering in and out all morning. It was starting to feel pretty cooped up and crowded in there, and the suspense and waiting was making me really anxious. I tried pacing around for a little while, then decided to chill out by myself in one of the suite bedrooms to try to calm down a bit. MOH/Sister Lauren popped in to see how I was doing, and when I confessed how nervous I was, she said, “Stop telling yourself you're nervous! That's going to make it worse! Flip the script. You're not getting more and more nervous, you're getting more and more excited.” For whatever reason, this was totally what I needed to hear, and it definitely relaxed me as we waited for Corey. Then! Yay! Corey arrived! The construction held her up by about 45 minutes, but ultimately it didn't change much of anything. As soon as it was time to stop waiting and start getting a move on our schedule, I felt much better, and my anxiety truly started to transform into intense excitement. So, Mom Octopus, MOH/Sister Lauren, Corey, and I hurried up and shut ourselves in one of the bedrooms because it was time to get bridal. Previously, in the Octopus wedding… We did errands all the live-long day. We ran late, we got stressed, and we argued. We rehearsed and had dinner, and had a great time doing it.  | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Let me start out by saying that Mrs. Sewing saved my butt on this one. After my custom parasol order on Etsy went bust, Sewing offered to send me a couple of the parasols she had leftover from her wedding. Not to mention that her DIY tutorial got me on the right track for doing them myself. I decided to paint our wedding date on the parasols my bridesmaids are carrying down the aisle. Let’s start with the final results: 
Sorry I had to blur out our wedding date.
I am not going to rehash Mrs. Sewing’s whole post because she already did a great job on directions, but I will tell you a couple extra things that I tried that worked well for me. Instead of a normal pencil I used a mechanical one that I wore the edge down on by scribbling on a piece of paper. I didn't tear through the parasol paper once, and it made a nice thin line. 
Also something that made a really big difference was a nice angular paintbrush like this: 
source The brushes were simple nylon bristled ones that I got for a dollar each. I used a couple different sizes, so experiment and see what works best for your painting style. I was able to use the thin edge to do nice even strokes along the outline. Has anyone else tried painting a parasol? Any tips or tricks you would like to share?  | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | It might seem like a bit of a no-brainer on a blog with this name, but I want to tell you about why you should love your dress. I've been a Love My Dress fan ever since Annabel first posted way back in the middle of my engagement, and I never really gave any credence to the title other than the fact that she had loved her dress when she had her wedding. It was only when I put my own wedding dress on that I realised that it is, in fact, vital that all brides love their dress because this is the metaphor you should carry through for every decision you make about your wedding.
The Dress...
When I had my initial consultation at Clifton Brides in Bristol, the lovely assistant showed me about six different gowns in a variety of styles. Even though I had told her I was after something quite slinky and more in the style of evening dress, she said it was important that I tried on different styles so I could be definitely sure of what I wanted. My inspirations were Jenny Packham and Amy Michelson, but I knew I'd never be able to afford either. Imagine my joy therefore when I was presented with a Benjamin Roberts gown that looked strikingly similar to the JP Elizabeth gown but was a third of the price! Love My Dress Wedding Blog - Photography Copyright (c) 2010, Source Images 
I knew that I wanted a dress that I wouldn't have to worry about, that I could run around in like an over-excited child, that didn't make me feel constricted, rigid or uncomfortable, that I could dance in with gay abandon and that my new husband would like. In the end I was so happy in it that I didn't even care about traipsing it back and forth through the garden and covering it in grass stains, or accidentally putting my heel through the hem. I'm pretty proud of these scars on the dress actually, as I think they're mementos of what a great day we had and how well the dress stood up to the task of being worn by me! 
The funny thing is, I hardly looked in a mirror all day so didn't really know what I looked like. It was only when we got the photos back after the wedding that I realised I kept stroking the pictures of my dress as it was the first opportunity I'd had to see the whole of myself in context. I loved my dress because it made me feel amazing, even when I couldn't see what I looked like. 
 
The Venue
Aside from the fact that I'm a massive geek and knew that I wanted to get married somewhere with enormous historical value, it was important that the venue also felt personal to us. Nick had a hard enough time trying to get his head around the fact that there would be people – lots of people – looking at him all day, the last thing he needed on top of that was to be put in the middle of a really ostentatious, austere room that made him feel even more uncomfortable.
 I'll be honest, I loved Ettington Park Hotel from the second I first saw it. It was a pitch black, bitingly cold February evening when we went to view it. The drive up from Bristol through the Cotswolds was a winter wonderland and then as we drove down the long country A-road, I saw it lit up in the dark from across the fields. I loved it!  
Luckily Nick loved it too. All the function rooms were just the right size for what we needed and not over-the-top. It really did feel like a house that happened to have a lot of bedrooms. I loved the fact that 'reception' was a table by the front door. The rooms themselves were all big and comfy and given that we had to use 15 of them as part of our package, we thought they would be a treat for our guests to stay in.
Obviously we were both hoping for a balmy September day, but we also knew that if the weather wasn't on our side we wouldn't be too gutted because a) we were using a whole variety of rooms inside for various parts of the day and b) the stunning Gothic architecture of the exterior would look beautifully dramatic against the backdrop of more severe weather. The ruined remains of a 12th century chapel in the garden where we were to have our blessing following the civil ceremony was just crying out to be used in a photoshoot too – I do love a good Gothic arch.  
And what better place to get married than somewhere that has "Loyal Je Suis" as the family motto? It was carved into every fireplace, around the doorways and even tiled into a mosaic on the floor. If ever there was a good omen…!   
I guess aside from its beauty, its accessibility and its luxuriousness, the reason that we booked Ettington on the spot was because we immediately felt comfortable there. In fact, we were so comfortable that we rather began to think of it as our new home after so many visits, and were a bit gutted when we had to leave the day after the wedding! The Photographer
It's hard to believe now but once upon a time I knew nothing about weddings, and as such I budgeted about £400 for our wedding photographer. How naive I was! However, as I surfed my way around the worldwide web of weddings it began to dawn on me that there's a reason why photographers take up such a large percentage of your budget – because they're worth it. Once you've packed up your dress and put away the last of your wedding presents, the real memories of your day are there for you in print. Your photos are the best way of remembering your day and I passionately believe that they are worth the investment. 
With this in mind, we booked Jordan Banks of Source Images, on the back of me picking up one of his flyers at a wedding show and very much liking that it all it had on it was a stunning image, their name and phone number. Sold. It's very important to get a photographer who can capture your day in the style you want, but even more so who you don't feel intimidated by.  
Nick and I were so ambivalent about photos that Jordan's very chilled out, friendly personality was just what we needed, along with his focus and direction to try and get a couple of snaps where we didn't look totally gormless. Jordan was both a professional and a gentleman and we are very happy with the images he captured.
The Details
Sometimes the internet is a magical place. Thanks to the wonder of Twitter, I managed to source my hair accessories from Chez Bec and my bracelet from Liberty In Love to go alongside my beautiful vintage earrings that belonged to my great-grandmother...  
My most important find though was Make-Up by Katy. I cannot recommend her highly enough. In the same way that I think you should love your dress, feel comfortable in your venue and have a laugh with your photographer, I also think you should feel great about yourself. I'm so ambivalent about my own beauty regime that had I have been left to my own devices, I'd have walked down the aisle wearing little more than tinted moisturiser and a lick of mascara.  
Luckily, Katy came to my rescue and transformed me. I don't just mean physically, I mean mentally. I don't know whether it was having her calming presence with me whilst we were getting ready, or just the fact that I could look at myself in the mirror and actually like what I saw, but my confidence grew exponentially as a result and I have to say that having the luxury of someone to do my make-up and take that worry off my hands really did make my day.
As sad as it sounds, I loved our very simple blackboard table plan in a gilded frame, which came to a grand total of £1.05 for the chalk and the black card, as the frame was out of my husband's pub. I think it looked pretty good for such a cheapskate option! My Mum had been to one wedding fayre on my behalf and managed to come back with Nyree Desiree's Cake Boutique enlisted to make the cake and Jennie Cooke to do the flowers. On both counts I was keeping to a black/white/pewter palette, so tried to keep things as minimal and unfussy as possible.  
And finally, I must mention the wonderful Rebecca and Tom of RT Acoustic Duo, who very wonderfully provided the soundtrack to our ceremony and drinks reception with beautiful versions of modern and classic songs. I know our guests appreciated the chilled out atmosphere as they sipped their Pimms in the afternoon sunshine, and I'm particularly grateful that she learnt Journey's Don't Stop Believing for us to walk out of the ceremony too – we can't help grinning whenever we hear it now!  
What did we learn?
I think it is so important that every decision you make about your wedding sits right within you because it's not about pleasing other people or trying to toe the traditional line – it's about your personalities and doing what makes you feel comfortable. There are going to be so many things happening on the wedding day that are so completely out of the ordinary and remove you from your comfort zone, that you should do everything possible to provide yourself with the opportunity to be relaxed enough to enjoy it all without being completely overwhelmed. ♥ Love your dress, love your wedding and love each other! ♥ 
♥ ♥ ♥ Thanks so much Emma for sharing your wise words with Love My Dress - huge congrats to you and your Husband on tieing the knot :) Emma kept a wedding journel in the run up to her wedding. She is also ever so slightly obsessed with cake :) Much love, Annabel xXx ♥ | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | It will require time, thought, and effort on your part, but it could save you a couple thousand dollars if you B.Y.O.M. (bring your own music, of course)! You save money on hiring a DJ or band, and you can control every song that’s played at your wedding, from your walk down the isle to the dinner music to the last crazy dance. feature image credit “But like everything else, if you want to pull it off and not drive yourself nuts, there are rules,” says The Broke Ass Bride. Here she lays down the laws of iPod-ing your wedding music: 1. Check with your venue about their sound system, what kind of equipment they have to attach speakers to, and whether you can get the speakers from them, or if you have to rent them. 2. Test the speaker system, leaving plenty of time to make changes if you have to (not at the rehearsal dinner). 3. Figure out the logistics, including moving the system from the ceremony to the cocktail hour to the reception. Bring extension cords if necessary. 4. Pick someone to monitor the music, because YOU will be a little too busy during the the wedding to deal with it. Give them a list of all the songs in your playlist(s), and review it to make sure they’re all on there. 5. Make a separate playlist for each segment of your wedding – ceremony, cocktail hour, dinner, first dance, cake cutting, bouquet throw, open dance floor, etc. Put them all in order. 6. The ceremony: Decide who is going to walk down and whether they will walk in to the same music. Use cross-fading so you're not being jolted from one song to another. 7. Cocktail hour: You need about 18-20 songs, depending on the length, to fill an hour. It’s a good idea to throw a few extra songs, just in case you're not feeling whatever's playing at the time. 8. Dinner: Create a good mix of fast, medium, and slow songs. You don’t want music that will put your guests to sleep, but you want them to enjoy their dinner in peace, too. Decide if you want to play straight through or shuffle your playlist. (Broke Ass Bride notes that her ipod and itunes playlists tend to shuffle in the same order. Anyone else notice that?) 9. Reception events: In case the timing is off, it’s good to keep each in a different playlist, instead of throwing them all together. 10. Open dance floor: Its party time! You want to get everyone on the dance floor, so think about your crowd and what will get them out of their seats. Hip hop? Country? Sinatra and the Rat Pack? Show tunes? Throw in a little somethin' for everyone! And here's link to $3 in MP3s on Amazon.com that we’ll pass along from The Broke Ass Bride. They download directly into itunes for you. Now check out the rest of her blog for more bold and original approaches to wedding planning and healthy budgeting. | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Well, It’s the weekend, time to sit back and enjoy some down time. And for your viewing pleasure I thought we’d try a What the Wife Likes post at the weekend. So today you can see what came of my bedroom renovations…. Starting with the Before’s. What Went… 
Like the rest of you, despite having grand plans and big ideas, I’m severely limited by funds and time. I’ve rushed a few ‘house renovations’ in the past and learnt the lesson that it’s better to do it slowly than to waste money buying ‘will do’ purchases that get ditched for ‘must have’s’ further down the line. Pete and I have furnished the whole house in this way after the last flat felt like we were living in Ikea, now everything is considered carefully and if expensive, saved for hard! 
A few old Ikea pieces have endured however and it was time to say goodbye… The TV. I still haven’t decided if this is a plus or minus – I miss watching it late at night with a film or on Saturdays while Pete plays footie in the morning, but it didn’t look pretty and I certainly don’t miss Match of the Day! The Lamp shades (and my earrings hanging off them – I now have a white gloss jewellery tree!) The old mirror – a cheap venetian look alike which was a steal from Ikea but I wanted a massive one I could sit or stand in front of and make the focal point of the room. The soft grey walls. A tatty old throw on the bed (Ikea again – that shop has a lot to answer for!) The cushions – made by my Mum from some silk I brought back from Thailand, these just show how mismatched the whole room was. It was a collection of things I loved once and some I still loved, but they didn’t go together and certainly didn’t provide a restful oasis at the end of the day! What stayed… 
Even in grand renovations, some things have to stay out of necessity or choice and my bedroom was the same. Somethings we couldn’t find a suitable replacement and to replace others would have been wasteful. So they stayed… Ikea White high gloss wardrobes. I love the glossy finish to these and I’m constantly re-inventing the interior with the latest cool storage. They’re a good ‘off the shelf’ fit for the space but they’re wonky and I wish we could get sexy built in replacements. Thats a big expense for a house we’re not staying long in though so they stayed put. Ikea Bedsides – More cottage than chic which was the eventual look we decided to go for, but these have proved hard to replace. Most options are super expensive and after doing everything else, it’ been a matter of having to wait a little longer. I do have my eye on some very similar to the Graham and Green mirrored ones in BHS for half the price. Carpet… don’t get me started. My dressing table – An absolute steal from Dunelm Mill 4 or 5 years ago when mirrored furniture just came into vogue – it became one of the focuses for our scheme, hotel glamour. White leather coin trays from Crate and Barrel a couple of years back. The Blinds – A neutral printed silk, they do the job and blend well so seemed unnecessary to replace. And now for the After’s… What We Purchased… 
The Graham and Green lampshades. These were the starting point for the room – I love Wallpaper and this Osbourne and Little print is so thick it’s almost flocked on a soft white gold back pearlescent ground. It reminds me of deco glamour and palm springs circa 1930’s. Had to have them and we kept the lamp bases which were from BHS again, many years ago. The Laura Ashley Lille Wallpaper 
Plain white bedding, with a contrast grey border trim from The White Company Cushions, also The White Company. I bought 2 throws to choose between and loved them both but could only keep one so I ended up buying both designs in the cushions for textural variation and the complimentary shades. 
I love a bit of Grey which provided the depth to the mainly white scheme. This throw (The White Company again!) is soft as a feather and so bouncy it really added the luxe feel we wanted. Add to that the reversible tones in a pale mink and silvery grey that meant I could fold it to show both and it was perfect. All the prints came from Rockett St George. The main one was chosen to provide a central focus in the room and we bought a set of six smaller ones for the hall. When they arrived, 2 were so perfectly matched to the colour scheme in the bedroom and the lamps that they were swiftly redeployed to tie the scheme together. 
My most searched for item was the Mirror, I stumbled across this in Next after looking high and low for something similar. Everything I found was eye wateringly expensive and I resigned myself to a purchase of the Gatsby mirror from Laura Ashley (it had to be BIG!) with a 30% discount… then they promptly stopped the offer. This one was still half the discounted price and looks beautiful! What I still have to buy…! So it’s still really a bit unfinished, but if I had waited for it to be complete I think I would never have shared and I know how much I like nosing around other peoples homes so I hope you enjoyed it. 
I’m still looking for the perfect new bedsides, a new light fitting – preferably a chandelier (and there’s now another 30% off in Laura Ashley for me to miss!) and that stool… Yours Truly, Rebecca
xoxo | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | I mentioned earlier that our reception costs were worked out on a per-head figure, but of course we still have the (zillions of) other wedding-related costs to think about in our budget. The cost of an average Australian wedding, according to this survey, came to $39,114. Now this is in Australian dollars, which at the moment thanks to the crazy currency-conversion rates, is pretty much 1:1 (or thereabouts) with the US dollar. Excuse me while I faint. Of course, you can only rely so much on surveys for accurate results, and there are certain things to take into consideration: expensive cities, type of population surveyed, what is being included within that price cost, e.g., honeymoon, pre-wedding activities, etc., but that is a whopping great number—and it seems to be a LOT bigger than even quite a few US averages I've seen floating around the interwebs. 
{Source}
Isn't Australian currency beautiful? So shiny and pretty and colourful. I've missed it!
I've mentioned before that Momma and Papa Jaguar have graciously offered a contribution to the wedding—nearly all of which is going towards a percentage of our wedding reception itself. Mr. Jaguar and I are currently working out what amount our own personal wedding budget will be; we're hoping to keep our own portion to around $10,000. These are the essentials that we either haven't yet paid for or are still needing to budget for: - The remaining balance of our reception costs
- The remaining balance of our ceremony and priest monetary contributions
- The remaining balance of our photographer
My wedding dress and attire (Well, the dress is done—now to figure out what next!)- Mr. Jaguar's suit and attire
- Hair and makeup for me and the girls
- Flowers and any floral arrangements
- Wedding cake
- Wedding cars for the big day
- Gifts for bridesmaids, groomsmen, parents
- Pre-wedding activities, such as engagement bbqs or rehearsal dinners
- The honeymoon!
I'm currently putting the word out to friends and family to see what resources we might be able to utilise in terms of “knowing someone” in any of those fields. I'm fairly sure we'll have a few contacts for things like the wedding cake and possibly the makeup, but there are still quite a few areas where we'll have to do our research with quotes and shopping around. Am I missing something major off our budget list so far? What were your essentials?  | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Mr. S is 30 years old, but he has never owned a nice new suit in his life. 
I just wanted an excuse to use this picture. He's just never really needed one. His office, where he has worked for six years, is super-casual, so he lives in hoodies, t-shirts, jeans and Converse All-Stars. It's incredibly rare that we go to an event where a suit is required, but for the occasional wedding, Mr. S would wear one of his two suits: a vintage one that he inherited from his grandfather (it was actually really awesome and fit him perfectly, but it got pretty raggedy after a while) and an ill-fitting suit that he bought at (don't laugh) Target (okay, you can laugh).
Mr. S just couldn't care less about clothes. He sees them as a necessity. He has no interest in fashion and his eyes glaze over when I mention anything to do with clothing. So, I was pleasantly surprised that I didn't have to drag him kicking and screaming to go suit shopping for the wedding.
On Saturday, we embarked on a journey to find the perfect suit. We were really hoping to find a nice suit for $300 or less, so our first stop was Syms. Syms is not fancy, y'all. And to be honest, it's kind of overwhelming. 
But I'd read so many good things about their prices (just ask Pchipz) that we scoured the racks for the perfect suit. And the selection was pretty damned good! Mr. S tried on about a dozen gray suits and I couldn't believe the prices! A Kenneth Cole, originally $495, marked down to $199! A Calvin Klein, originally $600, for $259! Amazing. If you're looking for a suit and you live near a Syms, I highly recommend it. We found about three contenders, one of which Mr. S preferred over the others, but we didn't want to buy at the first place we visited, so we decided to hit up the nearest Men's Wearhouse. And basically, they carried the same suits for twice the price. We looked at a few price tags and were about to tear ass out of there when the display of ties and pocket squares caught my eye. We found the perfect golden-yellow accessories, and I grabbed a white shirt and a pricey suit off the rack to make a little mockup of Mr. S's wedding day ensemble: 
Absolutely perfect: accessories for the groom and groomsmen - check! And we went back to Syms to pick up the suit that Mr. S liked best. Check again! And that was that! A relatively pain-free shopping experience for the man who hates shopping. You'll have to wait ’til the wedding to see Mr. S all decked out, but trust me: he looks adorable! Where did you go for affordable wedding-day menswear?  | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | No, don't go! I promise this post is filled with incredibly scrumptious-looking pictures, even if they do lack animal products. As you might remember, instead of a wedding cake we're having a dessert table with desserts baked by some of our friends and family. This is one project I have delegated to my baby sis, so I haven't spent much time thinking or worrying about this. We bought some decorations for the table last night, and I'm so excited to see what she comes up with. I have also contributed to her cupcake making by purchasing these adorable cupcake wrappers: 
Cute right?
However, the one thing I do have to figure out is what I'm going to make. I know I absolutely don't have to bake anything, but I really want to. I love baking and am really excited about the idea. Our table is going to be approximately half vegan and half non-vegan, and it's really important to me that the vegan options be completely delicious, both because it's fun to fight stereotypes and because I want the vegans at the wedding (e.g., my immediate family and aunt and uncle) to have great options. The cupcakes and cake my baby sis will be making are going to be vegan, and my aunt is going to be making something else vegan (I'm not sure what yet). I'd like to round these out with a yummy vegan recipe or two. Here are the final contenders. (All recipes come from one of my all-time favourite blogs, Oh She Glows.) Pumpkin Pecan Brownie Pie: 
Source 
Source Pumpkin Gingerbread with Spiced Buttercream: 
Source 
Source Pumpkin Spice Whoopie Pies: 
Source 
Source And now I'm drooling… I'm pretty sure I'm going to make the whoopie pies because they're so different. No one else will be making anything quite like them. I've also never seen them served at a wedding, so I think that might be fun. I'm also leaning towards the gingerbread because nothing says Christmas like gingerbread. That being said, that pumpkin pecan brownie pie is also incredible, so I'm torn. Very very torn. Oh, and if you're looking for a great holiday dish this year, you must look at this post. Amazing. What do you think I should pick? As a non-vegan would you try any of these?  | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | When I wrote this post about being a bride in your 30s, I didn't write it because I thought 30+ is OLD. Far from it! As a matter of fact on my birthday last month, I couldn't help feeling settled, happy and beautiful  in a way that I never did when I was younger. At the time I wrote this post, I was the only current/recently married bee in her 30s, so I just wanted to provide that perspective. As I said in the post, we should be happy and grateful that we have found someone to marry regardless of the time that person enters our lives. ~~~ 
(source) Yesterday I celebrated another birthday as the well as my first month as a newlywed. As one of the older bride bloggers in recent memory on Weddingbee, I figured that I would talk about being a slightly older bride. I've definitely appreciated Miss Star's posts about being a younger bride (here, here, here, and here). Since I've got a couple years on her (okay, like, a whole lot more), I thought I would also provide some perspective on the other end of the spectrum. I know that I am not the oldest bride/newlywed ever on Weddingbee, but I think being a bride marrying well after the national average of 26 years old for women in the U.S. has some specific joys and challenges as well.
One of my primary motivations for writing this post is that I often feel like sometimes there is this sense that there is a self-destruct button when one turns 30, especially for unmarried women. Well, I am here to let you know that I been to the mountaintop, and the view is fine. How did I get to be slightly older bride? I don't know, because I surely didn't plan it! I actually didn't meet Mr. Swan until I was 28. I spent most of my 20s without so much as a boyfriend. I definitely went on dates and had some significant romantic entanglements, but I had not had any long term committed relationships since my early 20s. Actually, by the time I met Mr. Swan back in late 2005, I had not even had a date for about eleven months!! I was at the point in my life where I didn't think I was going to get married, and to be honest, I was pretty okay with it. I had definitely made my peace with the idea of not being married and was relishing a life of complete, adult freedom. None of my friends were married or engaged; my family is not full of married people; and so I did not have what I like to call a "culture of marriage" surrounding me. Granted, I think when and how you get married is a product of a lot of different social forces. I think it's a function of where you live, your social groups, life choices; you name it. Based on my quick, unscientific sociological research, I am probably a pretty prime candidate/statistic for later marriage: (1) I have lived most of my life in the Northeast, which regionally has later marriage rates; (2) I've lived in major cities almost all of my adult life; (3) women with a college degrees (or more education) do marry, but on average a few years later than those who do not; and (4) for what seems to be a variety of sociological reasons (someone can write a book on this topic, and I think they are) Black women are the least married group—only approximately 52% are married by the time they are reach 30 (contrast that with apparently approximately 81% for white women and approximately 77% for Latinas). I was a stat, and I didn't even know it. Being a slightly older bride has its joys and challenges. Here are some observations from this side of the age spectrum: Pressure (or pity) from family or friends - I have been pretty lucky that Mommy Swan, my other family, and friends have never really made me feel inadequate because I was single through most of my 20s. I can't say that's true for many women that I know. Whether through pressure or passive-aggressive comments from family (and perhaps some friends), many women have to deal with a society that subtly tells them often that they should be married preferably not too early, but not too late, either. Pressure from within - I feel we all judge ourselves a lot. I know I am probably my worst critic. I think women especially give themselves a hard time about what they should be accomplishing by when and how (I do this constantly about my career), and I know that the "Oh no, I'm not married by 30!" conversation has happened at some point for many women I know. Whenever I mentally start down this path, I try to remind myself that I am at the place where I'm supposed to be, when I'm supposed to be there. It doesn't always help, but it stops my internal grumbling… at least for a little while. Starting a family - As you can tell by simply adding one to my age in my profile, I am now 32. I will be the first to say (especially since I have no choice) that there's nothing wrong with having kids in your 30s. While I agree that women shouldn't take their fertility for granted, children born to slightly older women can still be healthy and happy. This is all to say that I already know that I am going to be a slightly older mother than the national average (although not here in NYC, based on some trips to the park), but I am okay with that. Mr. Swan and I recognize the life shift that will happen once we have children, and we want to ease into it. We know we don't have the luxury of waiting for a very long time. Well, actually, we can wait, but we are well aware that there some possible consequences for doing so. When I get worried about being an older mom, I just think about Michelle Obama. 
(source) She looks pretty good for having two kids when she was in her mid and late 30s. A little bit of experience under the belt - I am sure that anyone getting married is happy with the timing of their choice, but I do feel that getting married a little later has allowed me to have experiences that I am glad to have had. I've traveled a ton, lived alone (and loved it), worked hard, and learned a lot about myself. I think you can definitely enjoy and grow from many of these same major life events while being married, but I think having done so will bring a little sumthin' to my relationship with Mr. Swan. Anyway, I just wanted to represent for the brides "gifted with a few extra years of life" out there in 'bee land. Regardless of our age, I think we should be happy that we've found people to share our lives with!  | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | This was my favorite post because I loved writing a whole series about the trials and tribulations that younger brides face and hearing from so many bees in the hive who were dealing with similar issues—it really helped me feel less alone during the tough parts of wedding planning to be a part of such a wonderful and supportive community. And re-reading this particular post reminds me of how far Mr. Star and I have come since the beginning stages of our little college romance, and it makes me excited for the many years to come. ~~~ One of the most common arguments against getting married at our age that I've come across is the belief that we will eventually grow apart. Is this a possibility? For sure. But isn't it always, no matter your age? Reader Veil Tales was kind enough to send me this Washington Post article, which refreshingly argues in favor of young marriage. One of my favorite parts of the article states: But what really matters for making marriage happen and then making it good are not matches, but mentalities: such things as persistent and honest communication, conflict-resolution skills, the ability to handle the cyclical nature of so much of marriage, and a bedrock commitment to the very unity of the thing. I've met 18-year-olds who can handle it and 45-year-olds who can't.
True enough.
Mr. Star and I have had a deep and intense connection that neither of us can fully explain ever since the very beginning of our relationship, but we both know that it will take more than that to keep a (hopefully!) 60 or 70 year relationship running. We know and expect that as people and as a unit we will change as we age and continue to "grow up", so to speak. Of course, this is true of any couple, no matter their age, but it's especially important for young-ish couples to accept and work with. These are some of the things that have worked for us so far: Actively taking the time to talk and "check in": One of the best things we do for our relationship is to make sure we have the time to have truly meaningful conversations with each other, whether it be about how we want to raise our kids or what our goals for the next six months are or how we feel like our relationship has been over the past few weeks. We usually do this in bed before we fall asleep or we walk around the city at night holding hands (the hand-holding is crucial!) and bare our souls. I think a lot of couples do this, no matter their age, especially at the beginning of a relationship. The key part for us has been making sure we continue to make the time, as three years in, sometimes it's easy to let the daily grind take over and leave us disconnected as a couple. Creating rituals together: A really big part of growing together for us has been the process of creating "rituals" together that keep us connected and give us stories and inside jokes. Some of the most important of these rituals that we have created center around the holiday traditions that we have worked to create for the Star household. We each had our own traditions with our own families, but we have been working to pick and choose from those family traditions and add in some new things to create special holiday rituals of our own that are special to us. Another way we do this can be seen more in the day-to-day: for instance, Mr. Star always makes it a point to come meet me at the subway station whenever I'm coming home from a rehearsal or work late at night. This gives us a chance to spend time together and gives us a little "tradition" of our own. It's things like this that we feel deepen our bond. Finding a happy place: Sometimes the stress of our hectic lives gets the best of us and we just need a place to go chill and get back to what's important. To some people, this might be the top of a mountain, to others it might be church, but to us, it's the lawn in Bryant Park after dark. We love lying down in the middle of the park together at night; for some reason, it always centers us. This is our happy place: 
(Photo Credit) Relationship reading: Knowing that we're young and that we still have a lot to figure out, we've taken some active steps to creating a healthy and lasting relationship. One of these has been to read some books on relationships together, which we think has really helped us. We've taken some concrete steps to improve our relationship because of them, but our favorite part about doing this has been the conversations that the books have sparked! One of the best ones we've read so far has been The Five Love Languages, already reviewed in-depth by Miss Duckling! Sharing a common thread: For us, the major common interest we share is the showbiz industry. Even if we don't both work in it forever, I know it will always be something we can talk about and relate on. For many couples, their common thread isn't work-related, it just so happens to be with us. Otherwise, we're total opposites! It's nice to at least have something that binds us, other than love, of course! Commitment to making it work: This is something that I've struggled with myself, which I think is (at least partially, I know well enough to take some of the credit for myself!) fallout from being a child of divorce. But I think this is one of, if not THE, key factor in a marriage that really lasts. Mr. Star is admirably unwavering in his commitment to being with me absolutely, no matter what, 100%. He is my example of how you should approach your marriage in this regard and I have learned a lot from him. Not that I ever thought, 'oh well, this isn't a permanent thing,' but sometimes I am stricken with fear at the possibility that we won't always want to be together. But the thing is, it's a choice. And we both choose to be together. Forever. Exploring the world together: One of my favorite things about being a young-ish couple is that we are getting to have so many "firsts" together. Our honeymoon will be Mr. Star's first trip overseas, for example. Our first apartment together was our first time living away from our parents and outside of a dorm. Mr. Star has tried so many new ethnic foods with me and I attended my first real rock concert with him. You can't buy that kind of lifelong foundation. Creating a family: Even though we don't have kids yet (and aren't ready for them for at least several years), we consider ourselves a family. We have Puppy Star and Kitty Star who we spoil like children and we all treat each other like a family unit. I think having pets has really cemented for us the fact that we're not just a loving boyfriend and girlfriend anymore, we are a family. That also gives us strength. Teaching each other about relationships: There's always more to learn about each other and about how to be better partners. We both have taught each other a great deal in our three years together. Mr. Star has taught me how to be more selfless and how to enjoy the present moment more, just as an example, and we continue to teach each other how to be better people every day. In the article I mentioned previously, the author makes another really great point: Marriage actually works best as a formative institution, not an institution you enter once you think you're fully formed. We learn marriage, just as we learn language, and to the teachable, some lessons just come easier earlier in life.
So he's comparing learning about marriage to something like learning a foreign language - it's A LOT easier when you start younger. Point two for us! Encourage the other's interests: Rather than stifling each others' interests, we each try to take interest in them. Even if I don't want to watch football every weekend, I know his favorite player. And even if Mr. Star doesn't know much about dog training, he still cheers me and Puppy Star on when we learn a new trick. I think this is especially important for young-ish couples because a lot of times we don't know exactly who we are and what we want out of life at 23, so it's extra crucial that we allow ourselves and our partners the chance to figure all of that stuff out. A lot of these things might seem obvious. And sure, to a lot of people they are. But they weren't always obvious to us and they're not things that either of us have had in previous relationships. And sure, they apply to couples of all ages. But I think it's especially important for young-ish couples who may not have had as much life and relationship experience to keep them in mind. And sometimes we young-ish couples have to try a little harder to overcome the natural selfishness and naiveté of being in our early 20s (nobody likes you when you're 23, anyone?). We have already changed so much since we first fell in love: we've gone from sharing a dorm room to living in Manhattan and chasing our dreams, we've gone from bonding over a mutual hatred of cafeteria food to learning how to cook for ourselves and each other, we've gone from writing love notes during class to popping off the subway a stop early to visit each other at work. So much has changed for the better and for the more complicated (as transitioning into adulthood is prone to cause), but we are nothing but more connected and more of a team. We have already weathered many difficult storms, and I know that we will continue to weather what is to come. How do you and your fiance make the effort to grow together?  | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | We hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving and are feeling all warm and fuzzy this weekend! Just in case you haven’t had enough of our beautiful autumn weddings on SMP, we have another for you today! From Yumiko at Hana Floral Design and Trish at Snap! Photography ~ we know this positively glorious New England wedding will put a huge smile on your face and give you a new twist on preppy fall wedding colors! 
Katie & Pete ~ October 16th, 2010 Pete and I met in San Francisco – he had moved there in 2005, and I in 2006. Although we met at a friend’s party soon after I moved there, we didn’t start dating until 2007 … and became inseparable after our first date in March 2007. We had SO much in common! Pete and I flew to Boston for my friend Carrie's wedding on July 4th, 2009, and I caught the bouquet! The next day, after walking around Boston with my parents, he proposed. I had grown up going to the beach in Watch Hill every summer with my family. My little brother and I used to ride on the Watch Hill carousel for what seemed like hours at a time. My parents often went to the Ocean House for cocktails on it’s deck. A month after we were engaged, my Mom said she remembered reading that the Ocean House in Watch Hill, RI was getting renovated so she called and asked if we could swing by for a tour. We toured the Ocean House in hard hats and reflective vests and had to use our imagination for what it would look like finished; the exterior walls were up but that was about it. We booked it on the spot that day in August for October 16th wedding, the following year. I had always known I would get married by the water, and the Ocean House was the perfect place! 
Floral Designer: Yumiko Flecther, Hana Floral Design in Mystic CT / Photography: Snap! Photography / Wedding Gown Designer: Liancarlo – purchased at L'Elite Bridal Boutique in Boston / Bride's Accessories: Custom hand-made necklace made by Devon Baer Designs, from Etsy / Hair Stylist & Makeup Artist: Linda Marzilli, Ocean House OH! Spa / Groom's Attire: Joseph Abboud blazer and Joseph A. Banks pants and tie / Rings: Bouvier Jewelers in Boston / Bridesmaids Attire: J.Crew dresses / Gifts: Custom hand-made pearl necklaces by JoJoLovesYou / Officiant: Deacon Stephen Cote from Westerly, RI / Venue: The Ocean House in Watch Hill, RI / Invitations/ Programs: William Arthur brand from Paper Source / Videographer: Matthew Williamson, friend /Entertainment: The Tristan Paxton Jazz Trio for cocktail hour & dinner and Devin Yazmer was our DJ. The bride's brother, Mike Connon, played his saxophone for a few songs, including the Bride's 1st dance with her father / Transportation: MJ Bus Incorporated / Lighting and Event Design: Devin Yazmer Productions © Style Me Pretty : The Ultimate Wedding Blog, 2010. | Permalink | 3 comments | Add to del.icio.us
Post tags: Devin Yazmer, Devon Baer Designs, Fall Wedding, Hana Floral Design, JoJo Loves You, L'Elite Bridal Boutique, Liancarlo, MJ Bus Incorporated, Ocean House, OH! Spa, Paper Source, Preppy, Rhode Island, Snap! Photography, Tristan Paxton Jazz Trio, Watch Hill, William Arthur
Post categories: Bouquets, Little Black Book Blog, Traditional Elegance, Wedding Flowers
 | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Wow! Snowy Saturday!!!!!! I can't believe how much snow we had last night - what is it like where you are? One very special lady called Anna gets married today (and her wedding location is FULL of snow today) - I can't WAIT to see the photos :) For now though, I thought I'd brighten up this Saturday on Love My Dress with a bit of Vivienne Westwood Wedding style and some very pretty reception detail shots. This wedding was submitted for a feature by London Wedding Planner, Olivia Soleto, who has quite frankly done an absolutely gorgeous job of styling this whole, wonderful wedding day. The couple who appointed Oliva to plan their nuptials were Suzanne and Andrew, who tied the knot on 25 September this year with a ceremony at St, Josephs Church in Highgate, London, followed by a reception at The Lord Stanley in Kentish Town. Suzanne's wore a Vivienne Westwood wedding dress, which got me a little bit excited, because this is the first Vivienne Westwood Bride I've featured :) "I saw the Vivienne Westwood wedding dress in a Saturday paper magazine. It was a feature on alternative styles of wedding dresses. I loved that the dress was very different (it was not full length), pink shoes and had a simple net headpiece. I also wore a net headpiece by Suzie Smith Millinery" Love My Dress Wedding Blog - Photography Copyright (c) 2010, Moments Captured Photography
Wedding Styled, Planned and Co-ordinated by Oliva Soleto Weddings   "I wore a pair of shoes that had been in my wardrobe for a while and only worn once. They were a fantastic red pair that really went with the dress. After I tried them on with the dress, I decided that I wouldn't find a nicer pair - this was my "something old"!"  
 
Alison at Pollen Nation supplied the beautiful colourful flowers and wedding bouquet...    Suzanne's Hair and make-up Artist was Laura, through Beauty Call...      "I wanted to keep everything very simple, so I only had my little 9 year old niece as a flowergirl and asked my best friend to be a witness. My niece just wore a pair of lilac lace pumps, this was paired with a pair of very pink tights. Sounds strange but honestly it worked! My niece's dress was from Designers at Debenhams. I tried many dresses from various websites and boutiques and this was the nicest."  
The couple hired a vintage VW Beatle from Polly Pootles, and a Routemaster Wedding Bus, for their guests...       Suzanne and Andrew chose St, Josephs Church in Highgate, London for the wedding ceremony venue. The Church boasts the most stunning interior... "I did always love Pachelbel's Canon, but so many of my friends walked down the aisle to that. So my next dream piece of music was was Ave Maria. We had an organist and soprano singer and it was so so beautiful. My dreams had come true!"       The Grooms suit was from Gieves and Hawkes...
      
 
 
 
 
Vintage style Tea Party... "I was struggling to think of a cohesive 'style' for our wedding, and didn't want to intentionally have a theme. I was on my way back from visiting my family in Belfast and was bored at the airport. I had been engaged for six months and hadn't bought a wedding magazine, so I went off to the shop and the one I picked had a number of vintage style articles. It was an obvious choice for me (I cannot believe I hadn't thought of it sooner) as I am often scouring shops and websites for vintage clothes and other things." The decor took quite a bit of effort for both our Wedding Planner, Olivia Soleto and I. We had a very blank canvas to work with in the pub and wanted to transform it into a vintage style tea party. Obviously the flowers played a huge part but we also got vintage lace tablecloths, chinese style lanterns for the ceiling, vintage style tea-light holders, vintage bunting, vintage crockery, jars of retro sweets.......and many more little touches to bring the theme to life!" ....including these fabulous postcards which were used to identify table names ...
 
 
  
  
  
 
  
  
 
Words of Wedded Wisdom... "Try to enjoy everything about the preparation and the day itself. I know its a well said cliche but the day itself is over so so quickly. It is the most amazing day and best day of your life, so take in every minute. I wish I could do it all again....... Get a video. Although we didn't really want to watch ourselves on video, it would be lovely to re-live it all again. We do have over 700 photos though which capture the expression of the day. Also, get a wedding planner. I could not have done it without Olivia. From the planning of it to the day itself, her ideas, support and advice were essential to the day being amazing. Given the overall expense of the wedding, it is affordable and not something that only celebrities should have. We didn't have a "first dance" either - again we wanted to keep it simple and not too traditional! We also are quite a shy couple who wanted to relax after the ceremony, but of course we were forced onto the dance floor by our friends and family, but we cannot remember to what!"  
So lovely :) Thank you so much Suzanne for sharing your fabulous style with my readers. Huge thanks too, to London Wedding Planner, Olivia Soleto and London Wedding Photographer Claudine Sinnet, from Moments Captured Photography. You can view more 'real weddings' and 'vintage style' weddings on Love My Dress Wedding Blog. Much love, Annabel xXx ♥ | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | 
On a super cold day, this is one super happy, shiny blast of summer-fun affair, which is going to remind you how the sun feels on your face and explode with warmth. How to do full on colour for your wedding day without looking like a primary colour paintbox exploded all over the place. We. Love. And it’s right here next week. The Saturday Round Up Get 20% off Hand-drawn Maps and make your stationery stand out Our sponsor Jim Marsden is giving Rock My Wedding readers 10% off his wedding photography package See what some of our industry friends predictions for the Royal Wedding are and what your thoughts are too… A silver wedding dress, something blue shoes, cool groom and vintage details, and funky fresh photography A classic English rose’s wedding… A Western inspired rustic day complete with Cowboy hats It’s the second post from our DIY bride Julie who tackled DIY cake stands with vintage china in What Julie Did…. And a sunflower filled South African inspired Big Day Oh and don’t forget to check out all of the new additions to UNDRESS, LOTS and LOTS of pretty! Of course last night was the Rock My Wedding Manchester Meet up, (with a sneaky Rock My Wedding team Christmas Party afterwards,) so as you’re all reading this, I suspect we’ll be nursing our heads, but if you want a sneak peek behind the scenes, check out the invite and what Charlotte and I wore, plus some mobile uploads on Rock My Wedding’s Facebook page. This is also a trial run for a new weekend approach from Rock My Wedding… You’ll have to wait and see if you like what comes tomorrow, but we’re working hard on putting some new ideas together from your Saturday Survey feedback last week… watch this space for changes in the New Year and thank you once again from all of us here, for your time and effort responding! Happy Weekend folks! Yours Truly, Rebecca
xoxo | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Even though it might be a little tricky to find maternity wedding dresses, there are some tips that might help you to find the perfect dress. Because of your changing figure, its best to look for floating styles that have stretchy fabrics underneath. This type of wedding gown will be more comfortable and give you the feminine look you are after. Dresses fitted under the bust work well to accent your curves and draw attention from other areas. Shopping around, you will be able to find the perfect cheap maternity wedding dress. Read more about cheap maternity wedding dresses.
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